Um, I just felt like having the music I'm enchained to, play with this while you're reading. But that'd be too much given the prior scenario, so I'd give that a pause.
After those 2 posts, I felt like why don't I have " " and spread out the content in Work.docx that way?? That would be fun!
I mean, sometimes at least, the question is what is "real" and "natural" of you? Real, in the sense that I know your absolute self to the exactness? Believability? That is what is obvious of you? Natural, in the sense of what comes easy to you? Either way, I feel like drawing infinite tangents to the function because your future self and the present circumstance conflict with one another. You know you're reaching that. Being an asymptote to it. So it's never still I guess.
"Commitment to sincerity, a vulnerable virtue".
“Many times, it’s unfortunately not about the reason that hardly works but it’s of progressing the prior perception. And the blatant lies that hurt the relation don’t work at all".
Misunderstanding and expanding like a hopeless elastic substance.
You don't have the right to win when you don't dare to lose.
There's nobody to question you cause there's nobody but you.
I fear the war for the reason that ends it (perhaps, abruptly) more than for what starts it.
I am nothing when you believe in your misunderstanding to the extent of immaculate trust and faith.
I'm emphatic about how certain things just cannot be quantified. The intuition, the instincts, the conviction, the belief, the gut, the echoing of suffering felt after a look at this timeline of events, and the weight of hope as heavy as https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OP6HdWvt9wk&list=RDMM&start_radio=1&rv=fJS5qb02Xp4 would take me ahead.
(By the way, fellas, I don't think I've said it here so here it is. Have this https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjk8NJkm1bwiHo0vfwV_F8rLdk7maEfob in hand when going through almost everything out there! You're essentially free to play them all along and personalize it all)
"I instinctively feel so touched and taken away by every other bit of the word, and the whole moment it becomes! Imagine memorializing them ages later when they're no more:) I mean, the Digital era has its own spectacles !"
The sincerity of thought is emoted with pure love.
"Wish you a great remembrance of your ____ , ____ to her and great mother to the capitalized " . Blessed by these words that you may not know you said but every bit of it is true to the core.
I still remember telling him "You visually stunned me a bit". Obviously, after 16 years, you had to gradually transform that way but here's a new person I'm meeting. That was the mood out there. He'd be too close to how I saw him and all. An ol' candied made a call from his phone, the one that is contemporarily perceived to be too average but as a phone, it's terrific. He immediately cut the call made and reached the destination there where he was called and then, here! From there, he was in front of us out of the blue. That was purely quick and moving!! As the convos went on and on, I said to him, "See, you are psychologically young nonetheless". And yes, he exactly stayed that way. Never losing out on the good ol' school content and staying alone, helping himself to the fullest. I was like "Oh it's not needed!" but good one dad! And yes, he served me food as a grandpa/gen x one does, it was sweeter and healthier than sugar for him to not have any physical drawback that would draw him back and be able to open the rotis in that packed construct, not spill out anything oily or any gravy. As dusk struck us, once again, I said, "you are psychologically young nonetheless". And we all smiled more than a bit this time.
A week before this,
“That sudden negative(later becomes so) bottling up inside as soon as the way you just talked, what you said, and what reminds me of something pleasant (but not happening yet so it feels thorny or something similar) and the truth that I don't have anybody but you to talk to so I'm all over you, settles down in a couple of minutes or hours. Not because I'm bound to you in the usual sense it means or anything like it but as things rotate in mind, stuff becomes a complete sense that actually I oscillated about". Time is that peep we've always had but either it's intimidating or undermined.
"You can let it go to the other side or keep it here. There's a borderline nonetheless. Needless to say, every foot of effort gradually forms a fort and that's forthcoming".
"It's funny (and destined) how the initiating and crucial components of the situation get through you. I mean, the call never clicks at all! It connects later. As natural as it is. In pain, witnessing the downfall and informing so as to be back, but it doesn't happen twice, though it happens for the third time. That's their situation. The greatness, as said, lies in the smile nonetheless (there's that fort of discomfort due to such understood unresponsiveness. I'm tighter like never before and it's becoming much tight but something needs to be done), for how funny it is!"
Moreover, isn't that a defining moment of how pivotal you are? This is just one example. It would be understating to think of anything else but feel through it and essay them this way. Throughout the decades, how able and humble you were for being able (and recently, a 2-decades old problem came to a sense cause of you)! Most of all, you've already stayed like the "you" for initiating this move of kindness and love, and now, such inner humility is exemplary." Being the real part of the PPP, i.e., push, process, and the product is an honor. When one's name reverberates, let it reverberate for something admirable".
When a sudden wave of events arrives, you expect that to proceed or go better as you kind of feel used to that.
Such a lie that sweeps underneath the carpet I knew had something brushed-aside or the so-called forgetfulness.
Have you ever wept for what YOU could have done and not how it's always about counting and asking for blessings (and definitely, not tying age with one's need of the hour and life!)? You are truly precious.
"There has not been a single day when I struggled to fall asleep. After these onerous modes, it's just what it is. It's nothing that I'm burning the dance floor as such but this idle-looking me has so much going on it. Just going through all of this particularly confined within a year, I feel nothing at times. Maybe If I take the phone, start recording and go on doing it for all, it could work more than this writing that I'm reasonably done with? However, it's that intoxication to not feeling the exhaustion yet, so you go on anyway. But, just closing my eyes and resuming later brings me to processing seamless joy :) And thinking about these couple of years, I know I've been unusually resilient and buoyant. In this phase of winding up, all of such thoughts are okayed. But, more visually and musically expressing myself would be the forthcoming phase hopefully "
The comfort in this thorny lamentation is strangely soothing.
"What is this for" eases the hyper-complicated friction to let us realize the web of threads underneath we could care less of.
"And see this so-called confidence in uttering what you did and in those who are equally so. Oh god, after listening to the beautiful words of your beautiful mouth, I'm wholly happy to know that none of you could go any close to the one in pain. Y'all be adding more pain than what's already worthless. Being worse in lending a hand to the one in suffering is a sad reality, but being this insensitive already got you that crown no honestly empathizing heart wants! An honest layer of softness upon an empathetic soul is possible, but what more to expect 😕 ? Mind it, the suffering involves subconscious life, (hopefully) subtly conscious willingness to live, and no usual movements at all -- a suffering that lonesome without at least 1 or 2 wishing you well. Anyway, don't even initiate these convos that lose out on the dignity of humanity". Well, like it's said, "You don't say that!" is such a saying which is important ln learning how to talk! The thing is, It's my greatness and, most of all, goodness in intuitively and psychologically holding on to you in your darkest and weakest times. That's love. That's understanding. Calling again or wishing good ain't bad at all! At least do none, then! Be a loving and understanding add-on to the handful of beloved seeing the gradual downfall of the one in such suffering, day by day! Moreover, having a few beloved and uplifting fellas is much better than anything else. Overall, "sick heart, sick mind, sick words."
If it's literally destined to, you'd be called by somebody in a deep trance wanting love and belief in such dense misery. You were called in such a way that you already solved a 2-decade-old problem like a pro, and this insane dream made it such that the caller entered your perimeter successfully. To me, witnessing this success has been a source for me to be grateful to you. Success, in a form, upholds humanity so deeply and thoroughly. Let me say, "victory is of the insane morale filled with sincere commitment." All these years, more than half a century, your words were as terrifically true as your interest in anything. Staying within your perimeter is a mountain of strength in front of the hope-shattering avalanche.
Now see. This is the last doubt you need to sob about. For you, this is really the last. Now coming back to what you've been told, think about it. If there is something in one's life that hasn't been really experienced at all and that is like a desire, such a lens would be confined to misinterpreting the most, especially those who are pure with no ill will. Children have the most honest and/or the most perplexing things to say/ask. Likewise, it's that of a characteristic. In feeling deprived of something, your daydreaming skills go so far. As far as misunderstanding so badly. And those you misunderstood have the traits they have, and you are no one to twist a century later. Not a century later. If I'm doing something and you come out of nowhere, this point of intersection is something I'd laugh about. To say that you ain't alone and you'd have the best shot in a way you haven't grasped is nobody's fault. At the beginning or deepest phases, "intention" is the way. Sure an intention is not enough, but this sense isn't really applicable here—intentions clear so much of the dusty air and sick smog around.
"It's been done before but what's been done before always went on forever and that was an immense disturbance without a doubt. Though it didn't have to go on and on, the manual-ity drove us crazy. Just that equipment is enough, the one that's twice less than this time, energy, and all sorts of investments spent. Fine, that's how it is but the thing is, does this system let the access of basic necessitates stay smooth? And don't even get me started on overcrowding the concrete jungle already worse than ever"
It's funny that you think they're all oh so good, clean, and clearly, what not? They were(and are) worse. This is really some side-ear crap. Don't forget that you are the only source of light for the collective good. Just don't.
Interestingly, you're being this conscious to the extent that you really don't need to, and nobody needs to! Enough of this kind of "consciousness." It's time to be truly relieved and away from being exemplary to hear such crap decades later. I mean, decades later.
"Um, we were just discussing. You haven't given me the final list to consider yet. You had to let me know of their responses. We were still discussing and....out of nowhere, just after the closure was found, you entered. I mean, where did I say go for it and where was the "it"? The list? This "popping" wasn't fun. Meh". Eh, a mess.
"I'm appalled by how you (it's not even you but your candied, cause you ain't got any tongue and voice at all) ask for something like S size out of the XXL size he gave it all as soon as he, though it should've been "we", was resting after the occasion was successfully done. And I'm glad that it's not yours that went into initiating, growing, and accomplishing this tribute to her. Hope she realizes now, who is who and what is what."
"If you took it that way, then push off, puh-lease! I've been there too, and I ain't blind, and my mind wasn't this perverted to share it all decades later".
Think about it. What you both have done for these many !! So even I'd think, "hey, y'all know me," and it's all one unit so wholesome, so I'd be very free and all. Maybe I should have had very few for the "ain't so deep" stuff, but do you think you want to fix yourself eternally? No. Joking a bit and relieving off the fire burners inside cannot be wrong. Nitpicking and sewing to twist the incidents and misunderstand the intentions have been so common! Imagine what they'd done in place of your person! Yeah, sure, everyone is too old to remember, let alone share, to hurt one another. Again nobody is bad as such, but don't be this too pure. I know you are all by yourself now with a void in the companion seat in your life for years now, so it would be very hard to hear the "real"; "rumors."
If you want the truth quicker, I prefer being late. To care to ask the "why," reason, and listen. Have y'all cared about any of it? Then, the quickness may not really work. In life, many things don't happen the way they do. There is a gripping turmoil that.
Why this? Well, what if this is it? Think about how to go forward. Moreover, it's funny (and sad) how the quickness of where all the half-known and half-cooked content goes is appalling.
No, you are not listening. You are ready to explode. You were always ready for it. I sure know you wouldn't take it. Some things, when they stay wherever they are, they go well. If asking just a "why?", interested in the reason and purpose, ever mattered, things would have been fairly transparent if not confusing.
"You just said it can't be any but one in a place. Sure, it can't be. This new piece of information was unexpected and something you didn't like. With that way more cranky and impulsive, you'd want to stay away. Let me make a call to deny it. Before that even happens, how you are stressing, too-stressing, and re-stressing on how important that is can tone down. I know it's disappointing, but it ain't impossible to wait for a moment! From "Oh, this setup would screw up the essence of the existence of the vision" to the typical "this much you couldn't realize?", they're all needless. None would know this new information, which isn't sweet at all, so let's go our way. Cool. But, throwing your "s*** scared" self like every time can get its reasons better. "
For what you mean to me and what this means to you. There can be an alternate universe, but as it goes, for what you mean to me and what this means to you, I am what I am. Let all of this weigh up on me, not as a burden, but as a present that pleases you and reminds you of me one last time.
"You got none. I got some, so let me itch you too much to snatch away the hard-earned content, not the ability and the willingness. Let me spoil the bond that could've been better". "Well, let me say this. He collapsed enough. Let me say this to you for real. If you entitle yourself to this kind of biology, um, there's nothing surreal about the utter zoological mess. It's funny how you couldn't wait any longer to assert your inexistent dominance and ownership of things you don't even have the capacity of cause you think nobody knows anything, saying oh, it's all mine and whatnot? Is this how you be when those with you, especially the one who fed you enough, haven't been doing well and are in a partial absence for obvious reasons that you should better help out in or at least zip your greedy mouth upon ?!!! A sheer disgrace."
A perfectly indecisive channel of hurtful decisions to your own self, a really good self that needs some respect too.
"You can be cut-throat, but you won't. Okay, so don't! It's the 101st mistake, but the horse is still told to be held very tightly. I mean, overall, the perimeter is everything. We can't know what's happening until anything is within it. The monkey tricks can be set right and, actually, won't even exist. I mean, let the sources that actually matter show back the dirt they splattered everywhere so thoroughly. That's smart and realistic. You've been doing all that. I learned that from you! However, you wouldn't want to rob of the preciousness of the words that come out of your mouth and the time that can go into the rejuvenation, right? It's a hurt, a shame, and a series of them both!, but you should spend no time and energy on cranky and cunning souls that breathe greed and suck out the love and bonding out of life (and lives). Those that are nowhere near an old soul and a child soul who can psychologically and monetarily uplift the one in need. Either way, that's all called charitably utilizing your gone beloved's savings and the returns from, say, a role/membership you forego. Moreover, as it's always been like, stay on the surface when it's about those who don't deserve otherwise, and you sure are the befitting one for that. As I said, I've learned these from you. The thing is, be so even when it's the rejuvenation time, i.e., a part of the day when you are off work since morning and, in other words, even when it's us, not anybody else! Sometimes you miss out on what you said yourself, and I can sense if it is so, but that's not all needed! The thing that prolongs your monologue that was never really needed or at least needed that long. The reason(s) can be better. They can be. However, after hours passed by, I couldn't deny how the closest do you wrong and how it will obviously pain. I sure know how terribly numb the hands and minds around you are. But, uplifting them, forgiving them, and still going up and beyond your capability hasn't been impossible for you. And cause I'm the only one, I'm absolutely fine with you. Go on. Tell me. ".
Relieved to know you've been through this week, too. You had to, and you did.
The dream that I'm grateful to. The dream that again exemplified the invisible wand called willpower that has been too visible and undermined that it now becomes the rescue factor.
I just don't have a lot to say but this is really it. You just don't need to justify anything. Nothing at all. No మొహమాటం. After half a month, the touch, the attempt to say something, what more important thing one would want?
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